Matrescence, metamorphosis and the eel

Twenty-three years ago, I came to Croatia pregnant with my first daughter. This week I returned, and sitting beside the Adriatic, I’ve finally began listening to Matrescence by Lucy Jones, a book that countless women on my caseload have recommended to me over the past three years.¹

Beautifully, heartfully written and meticulously researched, Jones gives space to the profound transformation of pregnancy on many deep levels.

As midwives, we devote much airtime to talking about blood pressure, fetal movements, scans, labour physiology, infant feeding and birth plans. All of which eclipse another equally significant reality that pregnancy is not simply a biological event, but a developmental transition.

Jones draws a compelling parallel between matrescence and adolescence.¹ The term matrescence itself was first coined by the anthropologist Dana Raphael in the 1970s to describe the developmental transition into motherhood.² Since then, researchers have increasingly recognised pregnancy and the postnatal period as times of profound neurological, hormonal, psychological and social change.³⁻⁵

As someone who spends much of my working life supporting people after birth, this resonates deeply. So many of the women and birthing people I meet aren’t only trying to understand what happened during birth, they’re trying to understand who they have become, which is what makes Matrescence feel so important.

More than motherhood?

Jones writes primarily from the perspective of becoming a woman and becoming a mother, which makes complete sense as that is, after all, her own story.

Elsewhere she has acknowledged that transgender and non-binary people can also become pregnant and give birth. Their experiences of matrescence are not explored in the book though she has spoken supportively on this.⁶

I feel matrescence might be understood not simply as the transition into motherhood, but as the profound biopsychosocial transformation initiated by pregnancy, birth and early parenthood: a transformation that may be experienced by people with different gender identities in different ways.

For many trans and non-binary people, pregnancy can involve additional layers of complexity: navigating body dysphoria, moving through maternity systems that remain deeply gendered, finding language that reflects who they are rather than assumptions made about them, and seeking communities where their experiences are recognised and affirmed.⁷⁻⁹ Some writers have begun describing these experiences as queer matrescence.⁸

Alongside this, queer scholars have offered thoughtful critiques of the concept of matrescence itself. Some argue that, because it has largely been theorised as the transition into motherhood, it risks centring cisgender, biological and heteronormative understandings of pregnancy and family life.⁸⁻¹⁰ They ask whether this inadvertently sidelines adoptive parents, non-gestational mothers, surrogate mothers, trans men, non-binary people and others whose journeys into parenthood don’t fit traditional narratives.

These are not arguments against recognising the profound transformation of pregnancy. Rather, they invite us to ask whether our understanding of that transformation might become broader and more inclusive.

This conversation has been underway for some time, led by trans and non-binary parents, writers and researchers. As maternity care strives to become more equitable and inclusive, it deserves greater visibility within maternity care and birth education.

As a midwife, I want us to keep sight of the extraordinary neurobiological and psychosocial transformation that pregnancy brings. The challenge is ensuring that the language we use to understand that transformation is inclusive enough to encompass everyone who experiences it.

The eel

Another thread running quietly through the book caught me by surprise: at one point, Jones briefly mentions eels.

It made me smile (and, if I’m honest, feel momentarily like a terrible cliché).

Six years ago, during my own perimenopause, I had an eel tattooed on my arm. I hadn’t read about eel symbolism, but became fascinated by this extraordinary creature and what it represented to me: migration, mystery and transformation.

Perhaps that’s why hearing the eel mentioned here, in Croatia, the place I last visited while carrying my first child, felt unexpectedly poignant.

Pregnancy. Birth. Parenthood. Perimenopause. Grief. Healing.

They’re all connected, all long journeys of loss and becoming, much of which happens beneath the surface, invisible to everyone else - perhaps why the eel continues to resonate with me.

Looking forward

I’m only part way through Matrescence, and I suspect I’ll return to it many times. It offers a language for something our culture has too often overlooked: that pregnancy changes us, not only physically, but neurologically, psychologically, socially and existentially.

As our understanding continues to evolve, I hope the language evolves too, becoming spacious enough to recognise the many different ways people experience pregnancy, birth and the transition into parenthood.

Metamorphosis belongs to all of us, however it reveals itself quietly, hidden or dramatically and visible to all

References

1. Jones L. Matrescence: On the Metamorphosis of Pregnancy, Childbirth and Motherhood. London: Allen Lane; 2023.

2. Raphael D. The Tender Gift: Breastfeeding. New York: Schocken Books; 1973.

3. Stern DN, Bruschweiler-Stern N, Freeland A. The Birth of a Mother: How the Motherhood Experience Changes You Forever. New York: Basic Books; 1998.

4. Hoekzema E, Barba-Müller E, Pozzobon C, et al. Pregnancy leads to long-lasting changes in human brain structure. Nat Neurosci. 2017;20(2):287–296.

5. Barba-Müller E, Craddock S, Carmona S, Hoekzema E. Brain plasticity in pregnancy and the postpartum period: Links to maternal caregiving and mental health. Nat Rev Neurosci. 2019;20:123–137.

6. Jones L. Instagram post acknowledging that transgender and non-binary people can become pregnant and give birth. 2023.

7. Ellis SA, Wojnar DM, Pettinato M. Conception, pregnancy, and birth experiences of male and gender-expansive gestational parents. J Midwifery Womens Health. 2015;60(1):62–69.

8. Belc KM. The Natural Mother of the Child: A Memoir of Nonbinary Parenthood. Berkeley: Counterpoint; 2021.

9. Hoffkling A, Obedin-Maliver J, Sevelius J. From erasure to opportunity: A qualitative study of the experiences of transgender men around pregnancy and recommendations for providers. BMC Pregnancy Childbirth. 2017;17(Suppl 2):332.

10. Halberstam J. In a Queer Time and Place: Transgender Bodies, Subcultural Lives. New York: New York University Press; 2005.